Like AC/DC...Back In Black

Thought I was dead? Nope. Thought I had nothing more to say? Nope. Been gone a long time. Perhaps it was laziness. Yeah, I think that was what it was. Let's try to get back in the swing of things.

I can't say that I'm shocked that no one reads this but a few of my friends. After all, I've never said anything profound. However, even in just surfing by, you would think that someone would stop by and tell me that my writing is juvenile and not worth the time. When I go to someone else's blog I try to be nice and say something. I thought that that was what this whole blog thing was about. I have tried to be comedic in my approach and try to make you think at times. I guess that style just was not working. I am sorry for that. I am not sorry for myself. Eventually, you may come across this blog. If you don't like it, say so. I can't fix what I don't know is broken. Enough of the preamble crying! On with the show!

The new politician

As anyone who has bothered to read my blogs, I have absolutely nothing for politicians. As Will Rodgers once famously intoned: "We have the best politicians that money can buy." Oh boy, is that putting the biscuit in the basket!

But, what does it take to be a modern politician? Well, first of all you must divest yourself of all of your principals, if you had any to begin with. You won't need them and they would just get in the way of your negotiations with lobbyists. Oh, wait a minute, that is not new, that's old!

Okay, then you must depend only on which way the wind is blowing to state your positions. Do not by any means have an honest position, remember you must only thing about your re-election, that is the only way to extend your deals with lobbyists. To have an honest position will only bring you scorn by your fellow crooked politicians and may make you a outcast. Oh my, could that be a continuing policy? Why, yes, I think that it is! So far this is sounding awfully cynical.

Money, money, money. That is all that you must think about. More money for your campaign,
more money for your golden years, more money period. You should try to court to the big money corporations and big money donors and ignore the people you represent because they can't do anything for you. You've got a safe district, the people don't know that your just an empty suit, an empty desk. But you have to look good! You got to get that look about you, oozing success and confidence! Voters don't care about your record, if you bother to compile one. Judicial Watch can rant about you, it doesn't matter. No one back home reads it!
Oops, again you've stumbled onto an established stragety.

Be insincere. Insincerely is the coin of the realm for a politician. You don't have to tell the truth, no one expects to tell the truth. It is not a job requirement. Stick with what works. Demonize the other party, what the heck, they are doing the same to you. What does it matter, neither party is different from the other! If your a crook, stay a crook. If your not, why are you a pol in the first place, go back to law school and learn how to be one.

Get religion, fast. This country is overrun with fundamentalist waiting for the rapture. You need to persuade (that actual job of a polititian) that your a God fearing man. You better fear God or this guys will have your cojones. Pepper your speeches with at least 15 references to God and relate your story of how you once were a sinner but now you are found. A guarented winner!

Old Boss, same as the New Boss

Well, it seems that really nothing, or no one can be called modern in the political game. Why write this? I don't know, boredom, anger, my Wii is too hot to play? I dunno, you pick one, I'm going to bed.

Ta Ta, and see you on the other side.